Monday, November 26, 2012

My First Friend

Well the time has come and passed to enjoy being so full it's uncomfortable to move, hard to breathe and your back hurts. Alternatively, you can spend your Thanksgiving evening waiting in line to buy electronics or stab someone or other madness for Black Friday.

I have too much to be thankful for; so much that words could never express it. I have been helped along my way and continue to be helped by so many people, to whom I am very grateful.

I figured I would share one story about one of the first people I met, outside of the world of Scientology that changed my life forever.

During my late teens, after I had stopped working for the Church of Scientology (I was working in their fraternal "religious" order called the Sea Org for three years), I was in a very bad place. I was scared of losing the roof over my head and the financial support of my parents. At the time I felt I had no options open to me other than living with them. I put on about 100 lbs in a matter of a year because I had no desire to do anything other than lock myself in my room with my games.

I was in a very bad place, a horrible place. I was constantly fighting off thoughts of suicide. I spent most of my time in the house and on the computer playing games with people whom I had never met. I had no friends and no one in which to confide. My interaction with people online was the limit of my social life.

For a while I was working for companies owned by Scientologists. My dad had some connections so I used those to build some experience until I finally ventured out into the real world. I went through a job agency and finally nailed a job that had no connection to Scientology or Scientologists.

It was at that job that I made a friend. He seemed like a cool dude at the time. He was the first non-Scientologist that I met that I could consider a true friend and not just a co-worker or acquaintance. I was in such a weird place and probably was a really weird guy (maybe I still am) at the time.

I've known him for about 6 years now and we are still really close friends to this day.

I met him at a time in my life where, honestly I saw no future for myself. I was slowly drifting downward, depressed and angry. I had nothing to look forward to, and even though it seems small, having someone at work I could talk to and be honest with, who didn't judge me or talk down to me changed my life. He showed me that there was such a thing as unconditional friendship.

He introduced me to some of his friends. It was with and through him that I found my family.

I started hanging out with my new found family on a regular basis and I finally had something to look forward to every weekend. Something besides playing 48 hours straight of video games. I had actual real people to talk to and who I could have conversations with. People who I could be honest about myself with, who didn't constantly shame, humiliate and abuse me.

He and many who have come since have made marks on my life that forever changed me as a person. Meeting him saved me from committing myself to what would surely have been a path of self-destruction.

I was living in such darkness and his friendship was really the first light in that darkness and led me to so many more.

Today, I am surrounded by loving, compassionate and caring people. There is nothing for which I could be more grateful.